The Spirituous Adventurers Episode 1: Ronnie’s Sex Shop ft..

The Spirituous Adventurers Episode 1: Ronnie’s Sex Shop ft. Dorothy the Dildo. After our stream on Saturday, we were lying on the couch, hungover, lazily brainstorming activities as no one felt certain what it was that the team should occupy themselves with for the day. After a few terrible ideas, I suggested we take a road trip and aim for the centre of South Africa. Sam put forward "Ronnie's Sex Shop" as a more reasonable alternative. Having never been there ourselves with and with a name like that we decided it was an appropriate choice. After putting on some decent clothes, grabbing a blanket and hopping in the car we set off in the direction of Barrydale, the closest town to Ronnie’s, a 3 hour drive from us. I was the designated driver as Sam & Ethan had spent most of the night up animatedly talking about god knows what (Can we thank the blowjobs for all this bonding?!) We made our way out of the city, Ethan, dead to the world in the back of the car. We stopped along the way to give our new silicon mascot, Dorothy, a taste of her new lifestyle on the road as well as to allow Sam’s car a rest whenever she displayed her warning lights (anyone know what the EPC one means!?) Needless to say, we discussed what the most reasonable thing to do would be if we were to actually break down and came to the conclusion that abandoning the car and hiding out in the bushes till morning would be the safest. We were glad to have gotten that out of the way. Swigging the most awful whiskey directly from the bottle and chasing it with an almost equally shitty beer we drove straight past our destination and accidentally continued on for an additional 12kms. @ethansawyermps found himself particularly fascinated by the night sky. I confirmed in my mind the necessity of glasses. @samtyler3207 was nearing non-human states of being as he was steadily nearing the second night of no sleep. The absence of cell phone signal as well as light made things particularly challenging but we did eventually locate a spot in which Ethan's phone was able to shakily give us some direction. We turned around and 20 minutes later pulled into an empty parking lot, almost knocking over an innocent human trying to photograph the stars in the process. After brief apologies and introductions, we were informed that Ronnie had closed for the night due to load shedding in the area (definition courtesy of google: When the demand for electricity exceeds the available supply, planned supply interruptions may have to be carried out. This is called load shedding. It is a controlled way of rotating the available electricity between all Eskom customers – you're welcome 😉) We decided to chill in the parking lot. Hoping that this kind human would politely fuck off so we could enjoy some naughty time and film ourselves doing so. 40 minutes later I headed up to ask what exactly he was doing as we were confused by all the flashing LEDs. Turns out he was taking long exposure shots with glowey balls in the middle (Weird?) Anyway, he spotted my camera and became very excited about the prospect of us photographing the stars together. He also had more whiskey, which by now we were sharing out of a little metal flask. I collected Sam and we proceeded to photograph the stars with the strange Afrikaans human standing in the way of the intended pornographic flash photography that would have been taking place. We found Ethan sleeping on our one tiny mattress using the only real blanket we had. Sam and I almost froze to death. Twice during the night, we turned on the car and drove in circles for warmth, less than patiently waiting for the morning sun, glaring at Ethan from our cramped positions on seats in the little polo. Morning finally showed up and with it the songs of birds and a more intense longing for this Ronnie and his supposedly amazing alcoholic milkshakes that we had driven 3 hours and slept on the dirt for. We took Dorothy for a tour of the place until some life made its way into the strange bar in the form of two rather friendly beings. We were kindly served 3 milkshakes, vodka & turkish delight, rum & coffee, peanut butter and jack made up the final selection. We ordered three full breakfasts and finished off with some rooibos tea. Ronnie then rocked up. He was fascinated by the fact that we had driven all the way out to visit his place and at some point, sat down with us to continue the conversation. We certainly made for a strange sight all disheveled in our pretty clothes in the middle of nowhere. He explained that the name actually came about as a prank. Someone vandalized his abandoned little farm stall which was originally called “Ronnie’s Shop”. He was apparently furious at first and left it there for about 6 years. During that period of time the road became a well-known route through the country. “Route 62” it’s now called. People started stopping at Ronnie’s Sex Shop and talking about the creative name and so, it stuck he said. They opened a bar and were wasted for months. We all laughed at this. He asked what we did for a living so we mentioned the respective industries before explaining that we also dabble in porn. He was interested to hear how we all got involved and so we exchanged a few stories. He shared a few personal ones with us and I felt grateful to have a real conversation with a stranger in which there wasn’t any judgement – something that is relatively hard to come by when you’re a sex worker. We paid our bill, thanked Ronnie for his hospitality and set off once more, this time in the direction of a warm bed and some hot water. Both Sam and Ethan slept almost the entire way home as I sat in silence, trying not to fall asleep, thinking about how fortunate I am to have such an incredible group of open-minded people as my friends. We have decided to call our group The Spirituous Adventurers. We also have a mascot, Dorothy, in case you hadn’t noticed 😉 We intend to run off again soon, this time in the hopes of getting some real sexy time action, possibly in the bushes, possibly in a beach house. Will keep you updated. Hope you had an awesome weekend. We certainly did!