B.O.O.B: Shadow of the apocalypse ⚔️ long dark post so if yo..

B.O.O.B: Shadow of the apocalypse ⚔️ long dark post so if you don’t wanna read it just skip. in the middle of the night i woke up from another of the many apocalyptic dreams i’ve been having recently: earthquakes … nuclear world ending and men in hazmat suits cleaning up the remains of my mom after i get to her city too late … being on a ship that sinks, then floats back up and gets engulfed into an inferno of flames … facebook being in charge of a massive worldwide psyop and psychological warfare that kills people or tricks them their loved ones are dead so they do destructive things … i be having some disturbing dreams lately and i’ve been having interrupted sleep cause i’m afraid there will be worse ones. somehow they always get worse. in dream analysis rhetoric, world ending symbolizes upheaval and transformation. i believe that, my life has been massively terraformed this year, and this month in particular.

in this dream i was armed and climbing a mountain in the total darkness of night to get to a shelter/safe house. omw there i walked through puddles of red meat and dead carcasses that were forming an obstacle course within dead trees. it looked like a metal album cover / nirvana music video / much grosser and more realistic. at the safe house there was a little girl, a bratty obnoxious girl with a smartphone, who kept trying to throw rocks w a sling shot at a cat that was not really there, a mirage/simulation of a cat that kept teleporting and warping to other places in the house as the girl chased it. then the girl complained that the government was out to get her because she’s been playing too many sonic and mario games and they’re cutting her off. i felt an urge to stop what she was doing at any means necessary. 💀💀💀 🥩

the girl is an aspect of myself, the cat mirage is a vestige of my goals and aspirations, which keep changing and being too ephemeral for me to grasp so i give up on them. the safe house is a space where i can enact my true inner psychodrama without judgement.

every dream contains a wish, do i wish to eradicate my innerchild’s destructive urges? has it called attention to my wish to disarm my pain/childhood trauma using violence and self destructive behavior? among light workers the shadow work isn’t much talked about, but self confrontational content is important imo bc that’s how you really move on and grow as a person, idk tho just girly thoughts in the dead of night haha heehee 🤗💋🌙🎀💖💖

i am reiki certified and i’ve been feeling the calling to explore spirituality and esoteric things more this year. spiritual bypassing is bullshit tho, it’s not all rainbows and light and yoga and kale juice and namaste - imo true spiritual work is in the shadows, in the shadow selves, in the self confrontation that we all must do to transcend ourselves. i’m in my saturn return 🪐 and i feel a massively significant overhaul of my life. idk, not a sexy post but just wanted to share. it’s been a tough month. i’m tired.

bitch has been reading too much Lacan……. 😒