Honestly.... has my content been lackluster? Don't be afraid..

Honestly.... has my content been lackluster? Don't be afraid to tell me why, I want honest critique that would help me better myself and my page. This month has been the slowest for me since the August porn ban. I hope it picks up because watching the declining numbers sucks ass. Maybe because of my demotivation, depression, no one requesting anything, it all being a vicious cycle, I've felt bad about what I put up here -- it's like a tug of war between considering my creative side and people-pleasing generic porn. The rest of feb I will probably lean in to the slowness and not do much. I'm extremely grateful to those of you who *do* support me 💗

My tip menu is pinned to my profile if you want to request a service. I write about this in the parasocial exploration of Cyberhorny but .... ( if you missed it: https://onlyfans.com/241360171/nastyavalentine ) ✨ People will sometimes say "yes queen take a break I'll still be here when you're back" but truthfully very few will actually remain. And I get it, I get why, when you're paying for something you want your money's worth. People also forget. It's easy to forget with so many life distractions. This can not be taken personally. I have to be objective about this when thinking about myself as a brand, a fantasy, an intentional object, instead of a person. I used to believe that my page offered value way beyond the $12 a month, and I still believe that, but I can't help sometimes tying my self worth to something as abstract and mediocre as an internet following. It's more complex when it's tied to my livelihood.

I wonder what would happen if I *do* take a week off. A month off. And make a comeback. Would it work? Would people still be interested? Or am I done, to do this and then forcibly retire?

This was a month/beginning of the year when I focused more on my irl life than my online content, and it's been amazing, but it also sucks hard to see the numbers always go down. Why is this happening? What can I do about this? The anxiety... You can't possibly imagine how disheartening it is. It's a new digital kind of sickness. I can't magically create more subscribers, make anyone happier, or pull new and original content out of my ass every single day, and yet I try, futile as it may be. It's only up to the people who want and choose to be here. I've reached a stage of acceptance of whatever happens to this account happens, I know that by the end of the year if my numbers continue to decline I will quit OF and pursue my art in other directions. Sometimes simply people just get tired of you without telling you why. If you unsubscribe, stop interacting with my content, or turn renew off, I have no problem with that, but I would like to know why.

And yeah if there is honest critique about how I could improve my page I will listen -- maybe not implement it overnight because Rome wasn't built in a day -- but I will think about it objectively.